Thursday, March 21, 2013

The Anatomy of Sadness

Not a very happymaking title, or? However I tend to compare being a Happymaker to being a surgeon: we cannot understand and fix something until we know our problem inside out. And to me personally, surgeons are those people who know our bodies inside out, still they continue to discover new things, continue to reinvent their techniques, are always hit with diseases and situations they have not seen before. Similar to making people happy if you ask me, although theoretically there is some recipe that should work (health, money, friends, travels, inner peace,  you name it!) you always end up discovering that more is needed, or that nothing can make some people happier. But before trying to find alternatives and discovering new techniques, the happymaker needs to know about some basic "diseases". Let's start with what I like to call the cancer of happiness: the SADNESS.

As my friend Sherlock Holmes would have said, for a complete immersion into our investigation, life has pushed me to experiment this myself a couple of times. Actually this time last year, my dad was passing away, my happymaker was leaving me and the worlds were about to collide- so no better time to write about sadness than today! And because I'm a happy soul and didn't want to write a weepy post, I'll keep my report in the sciences area :)

So how does sadness work? 5 observations:
  • It strikes more powerful or pretty subtle and we accept it because we consider crying for days, not eating, trying to hurt ourselves or whatever as being NORMAL. Mistake number one, don't fool yourself that being sad is normal, otherwise you'll end up spending more time sad than happy.
  • Just like cancer, it spreads, and before you notice, the consequences of being sad start reflecting on your body - thyroids, liver, brain..all can be seriously affected.
  • It affects others- your family, friends, people you work with will see the same face but never hear the same old happy you again. After some time you will success to push them away.
  • It always comes back. Memories are a great gift God has given us, but regrets and bringing back sad moments in our lives are pure poison. I can quote another friend here, Mr Robbie Williams "no regrets, they don't work, no regrets, they only hurt". 
  • It changes us, which is normal, everything we go thorough in this life leaves a footprint on us. However we can still control HOW we choose to be changed, if challenges teach us something and make us stronger or if we will never stand up again. So it's ok, accept you're a bit different now. We all are!
Hopefully now you see being sad is serious business and won't go back to that dark place in your mind too often. Especially since not all of us are great poets and writers to make some stories that sell out of exploring our feelings and emotions :)

Remember to smile,
it's FRIDAY!